War with myself

How do I help her? A woman who has it all but is caught in the grasp of depression. No amount of times I hug her or kiss her, it's not enough. Am I the failure for her? Do I give her the space she needs but doesn't want? Am I not there as often as I should? I just want her to be happy. She deserves that in abundance. The most selfless person I know. What did she do to deserve this sadness. How do I help? I wish i could help.

War. A fight between two enemies and yet there's only one side with me. Who is fighting with my mind. I have alot of good things in my life, a good job, loving parents, financial stability, good friends and yet I only see the bad things. Why does my mind want me to be down. What does my mind benefit from me being down?? How do I win a war against myself? Therapy? Drugs? Religion? Surely I'm in control of my own mind. My own feelings. Me. Such a happy child aswell. This world is a cruel place and yet there's so much beauty at times. I wish I knew how to write things out properly. I hope blogging helps me understand my feelings. I'm not usually good at telling people my feelings. Not anymore. A war I will win one day. War with myself.